Death Row: The End of the Line For John Rickards
Submitted by Damon on Tue, 03/11/2008 - 16:06
It may, or may not be a wrongful conviction, but you’ve been found guilty and sentenced to death. Tell us how you’ll spend your last hours.
Victim: John Rickards, author of BURIAL GROUND
What’s on the menu for your last supper?
Chilli. Hot and plenty of it. Maybe a couple of beers.
Priest, prostitute, lawyer, lover? Who’s your last visitor.
Lover, probably. Depending on my personal circumstances at the time and its apparent allowability, maybe a prostitute. I mean, why not, really? Last night on earth and all that.
What’s the last book you’d choose to read?
SURVIVOR by Chuck Palahniuk.
Given the choice, what’s your preferred method of execution?
Firing squad.
Ideally, what will it say on your headstone or in your obituary?
“Rickards was a consummate artist with the strength of an ox, the body of an Adonis, an IQ of several million and an unparalleled skill in the lovemaking arts. He was arrested by a corrupt, totalitarian police state while simultaneously pleasuring thirty-five of the world’s most attractive women in celebration of his discovery of the cure for all known diseases. Despite being naked and unarmed, he successfully fought off an entire police division, killing over two hundred men, while delivering a string of stirring speeches and bringing at least a dozen of the women to orgasm. In the end, he was only captured with the aid of an armoured brigade armed with tranquiliser gas. Rickards is succeeded by three sons and four daughters on the artificial tropical paradise island he created and ruled.”
Bio: John Rickards writes thrillers for a living, largely well-received; "well-received" meaning he has to give them away to get anyone to read the bastard things. He'll do anything for money and lives in one of the UK's retirement and suicide hotspots with his partner and baby boy.